I often wonder why this world and life is twisted.
More often than not, deception is a person's number one tool and facades are the accessories of choice.
With such bleak choices, how is it possible for a person to fully trust another? It is often said people need to let out all the anger and pain that they are feeling but to whom can they do it to?
It is just not possible to let everything out. Simply because of the reason why we need to let everything out: We are all human beings, we are all imperfect. This is the irony of the situation.
When something is let out, things will change. Its useless to say: "Just let everything out. You will feel better and things wont change between us."
People being people always try to find ways to climb up whichever ladder they feel is most important at that point in time, be it the social or job ladders. Like the saying goes:"Everything you say can and will be used against you" except this time it will not be in the court of law but in the theater of life.
I sound so bleak but guess what? Welcome to life where everything you say and do will be judged, where every single word or action reflects on you.
I was just looking at some of my older posts in my blogs, which unfortunately you will not find since they're somewhere else, my life has not changed much at all. In fact, there appears to be a cycle where everything good will end and just when I begin to pick up the pieces, another problem will loom on the horizon.
I should be used to all of this. After all, everyone seems to have the perception that I lead a perfect life, having a rich family, branded a socialite because they think I know almost half of our nation's population, think through everything well, able to interact with everyone I meet and just seem to not have any problems at all because I can help everyone listen to all of theirs.
Well guess what? None of the above is true. I'll will not air my family's dirty laundry so I will not elaborate on that, needless to say, it is not true. I do not know half of our nation's population which equates to about 3 million people. And eve if I do know a fraction oft that, they are like what I said, I just know them, acquaintances. In fact, I do not know if i can consider anyone a true friend. I do not think through things all the time, and even if I do, half the time I act based on my heart and not my head.
And last but not least, I am not problem free. My blog alone is ample proof. and I shall stop here. As much as I wish to continue, I will not. I already have revealed too much in the public domain.
As I have said a very long time ago,We just put on a Facade in a Masquerade, the Masquerade of Life.
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
8:16 AM
I'm currently in love with musicals yet again. I'm addicted to songs from Sweeney Todd and The Phantom of the Opera. Two beautiful musicals. I realised that the latter is a classic. I would to be able to get the chance to stage The Phantom of the Opera. The songs are beautiful.
Tomorrow promises to be a brilliant day. Those of you having exams tomorrow at the exam hall, come find me outside the hall!
But I need to find something to do after that -_-
Anyone free?
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
9:53 PM
So many movies to watch.
I have to admit, I've been procrastinating so much work. I have 3 things to finish on photoshop yet I also have filming to do. Sometimes I think its awkward that I'm the only year one doing video so usually I will hang around them. If other people think that I'm sucking up, then they are just uneducated people.
Next week should be more free but I do want to go out with friends.
Will be watching L on tuesday with Kuan Wei.
I've already watched Juno an Sweeny Todd and they are good. Sweeny Todd is a beautiful musical though it is abit gory and has a very sad ending.
I cannot imagine what life will be like next semester. What type of friends will emerge? Who will enter my life? How will i live life? so many ridiculous questions.
At least we are watching the dance concert together as a council. Mostly anyway. We'll enter glamorously dressed to scare everyone.
Until then.
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
12:05 PM
We've made a great mess of love
Since we made an ideal of it.
The moment I swear to love a woman, a certain woman, all my life
That moment I begin to hate her.
The moment I even say to a woman: I love you! ---
My love dies down considerably.
The moment love is an understood thing between us, we are sure of it,
It's a cold egg, it isn't love any more.
Love is like a flower, it must flower and fade;
If it doesn't fade, it is not a flower,
It's either an artificial rag blossom, or an immortelle, for the cemetery
The moment the mind interferes with love, or the will fixes on it,
Or the personality assumes it as an attribute, or the ego takes possession of it,
It is not love any more, it's just a mess.
And we've made a great mess of love, mind-perverted, will-perverted, ego-perverted love.
D.H.Lawrence.
(Thanks to a certain someone as well)
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
11:48 PM
And so my two role-plays did not go very well. Terrible.
Watched Elizabeth: The Golden Age yesterday and it was brilliant. Cate Blanchette deserves an Oscar for her performance. She certainly ranks with Meryl Streep as one of the best actresses of all time. Her controlled performance simply shows her talent.
Performances like these make me envy how their characters are able to control their emotions so well, masking happiness, sadness and anger with just a straight and nonchalant facade.
This allows them to have an aura of regality and confidence about them.
Perhaps I should do the same.
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
7:45 PM
I learned something valuable this semester: never procrastinate.
I ended up doing everything last minute. As it stands, my speech was done two hours before presentation and the presentation fro persuasive communications was very last minute which turned out disasterous.
And now, I have two role plays, both of which have yet to be memorised. Terrible.
In any case, Claudine and I got to meet a prospective French lecturer during lunch. Jerome asked us to have a chat with the, since that guy wanted to talk to the students.
Claudine and I couldn't decide if his name was Nic or Eeks.
In any case, his quite nice and I like his British accent, he is British incidentally, but I think Jerome is still the best.
Au Petit Salut outing soon.
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
9:21 PM
I'm just extremely disappointed.
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
2:16 PM
hello.
Just finished filming.
Had time to go back to TMS just now. It was very nice to see all my beloved teachers again.
It was wonderful to talk to Mdm Sharifah, Mdm Suriadi, Mrs Maesten, Ms Morni, the cikgus and of course Mr Oh. I wished Ms Lee would come back. hmm.
Its time for me to move on.
What am I going to do now?
Well, lets just finish all my presentations and stuff and I'll find something.
Australia's beckoning.
And the party should start soon.
Until then.C'est la vie
And a happy chinese new year to all.
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
12:31 PM
And then there were three.
The speech is finally done.
Only 2 role-plays and 1 presentation left.
Thats not counting MMP test on th 15th.
And then there were none which signals the begining of the holidays.
Its been such a dismal week. Irritation everywhere. Goodness, what will it take for all this to end.
Tomorrow is another day. Good bye.
By the way, I found a very nice new drama to watch. Go catch Gossip Girls.
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
11:41 PM
Apologise by One Republic
I'm holding on your rope
Got me ten feet off the ground
I'm hearing what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me
Then you go and cut me down but wait
You tell me that you're sorry
Didn't think I'd turn around and say
That it's too late to apologize
It's too late
I said it's too late to apologize
It's too late
Yeah
Oh ooh
I'd take another chance
Take a fall
Take a shot for you
Oh
And I need you like a heart needs a beat but it's nothing new
Yeah yeah
I loved you with a fire red
Now it's turning blue
And you say, "Sorry," like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid
It's too late to apologize
It's too late
I said it's too late to apologize
It's too late
Whoa oh
It's too late to apologize
It's too late
I said it's too late to apologize
It's too late
I said it's too late to apologize
Yeah
(Too late)
I said it's too late to apologize
Yeah
(Too late)
I'm holding on your rope
Got me ten feet off the ground
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
10:56 PM
