For the first time in such a very long time, I broke down. I guess, I should not be saying or writing down all this but unfortunately, I think its time I slowly release all that is inside of me lest I blow up.
I truly long for someone to talk to. Someone whom I can speak and pour all my sorrows out. I am truly a product of my environment, an environment where no one can be trusted and that survival was the most inportant thing.
As time flew by, working its magic on all that once was, i just stared into space, enjoying the silence that was slowly whispering in my ear. The very reason why i went to polytechnic instead of a JC was to escape the hectic and political system that existed. Frankly speaking, I was tired of playing the game. Yet perhaps for that very reason, I have been plunged into the abyss.
How I once thought I could for once, totally enjoy and spend time with all of you, being able to let my guard down and not have to look behind my back every few seconds. I tried so hard to make it all work, sacrificing so much time and effort. I always tried to be there for each and everyone of you, to share your sufferings with you and to spend happy times together. As I look back, I admit, I had alot of fun spending alot of time with all of you.
Yet the happiness was shortlived. I cannot bear to suffer anymore. As i try to let my wounds of the past heal, another always seem to appear, slashing at the very same spot. All of you have made your choice and i respect your decisions. Perhaps, its time for me to look back and rectify where I have actually gone wrong. JY really hit the nail into the coffin when he said that the nine doesnt exist. There are only eight. Well, he is right, it will be a group minus one, me. All of you have spoken clearly enough for me and I only have this to say.
The darkness that enshrouds me as i gaze upon the stars,
bring warmth, pain, saddness and misery.
I now wish all of you a pleasent farewell
and i shall leave you all with one last word
Goodbye.
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
7:29 PM
terrible. just one word. i nearly blacked out when i saw my med soc. what the hell? i studied freakig hard for it. ok maybe it wasnt that hard but nonetheless, i studied. unlike journalism. whats more clifford yap had the audacity to say that maybe i shldn hv studied. WHAT THE HELL!! i just feel so depressed now.
a combination of such terrible shit just isnt making my day. nodoubt the transformers movie was magnificent and scored super high on my list, other then that, it was CRAP! oh and whats more, i still have so much work to do and my poster sucks. how on earth am i supposed to get my A for ess gra? i can practically kiss my A good bye for med soc at the end of semester.
i need to find comfort and solace soon. out.
Nathaniel Iman sprouted nonsense at
11:38 AM
